*Cue T-Swift playing in the background* Yay, I finally get to change my blog title so it says I am 22 and not 21! Today is my 22nd birthday and it has been a great day. I got texts, phone calls, messages, FB posts, etc. all wishing me a Happy Birthday and it was a great display of how many people truly care about me 🙂 I am blessed with some amazing people in my life!
This Birthday was a big change from how things were last year…last year was the worst birthday I have ever experienced. I was at PHP during the day, had some family stuff going on, and was unable to fully enjoy my best friend’s surprise visit because I was so wrapped up in eating disorder thoughts. I ended the night using eating disorder behaviors and crying. Today was so different. I went out for breakfast and ordered whatever I wanted to eat and let myself eat as much as I wanted. I self cared by taking a nice warm bubble bath with my essential oils diffuser running during it.
The past is the past and no one can change what happened last year. However, I am proud of the work I put in to make this year so much different! Sometimes I spend way too much time comparing the present to the past in a really harsh way. The comparison is often a way for my depression/eating disorder to tell me how “bad” I am at recovery. I am now more in a place where I am moving away from comparing such-and-such moment from one time to another with the present having to be “better” or so different. I am focusing instead on how I am different and how I have made so much progress in my hope, faith, resiliency, gratitude, self expression, self love, confidence, and authentic self. I hope, wish, and pray that my 22nd year can continue to be a journey of self discovery.
I am excited to see what my 22nd year will bring! Thank you to all my wonderful friends, family, blog readers, etc. who I get to share today with 🙂